Although I've made several kinds of videos such as vlogs, news packages, PSAs, and promos over the course of six years, this is the first time that I'm going to make a narrative short film. I've been working on this film since Christmas of 2017. At the time, I made an outline, a treatment, and a character grid for the main character, Marko. After that, I started working on the script in January 2018 and finished it a month later. I made several revisions of the script until I finished it in January 2019. It took a while for me to edit my script, but it's a rewarding experience for me. After that, my crew and I got to work such as location scouting and holding auditions. Now, I'm getting close to the point when I actually shoot the film in early April 2019. I can't wait to find out what it's like to direct a film.

"Censored" is a comedy-drama film. Although there may be funny parts here and there, this film deals with serious issues such as loneliness, censorship, and the dark side of superiority. The most important theme is freedom of speech. Everybody has the right to say whatever they want, including profanity. No matter how much you want to, you can't control other people's lives to make them the way you like. The other theme that is explored in the film is acceptance. People should accept others the way they are, no matter how different they are. For example, Marko is very sensitive to profanity. This may sound weird to the audience, but's that a part of who he is. Nevertheless, this shouldn't discourage anyone to get to know him. He may be the perfect friend that someone wants to have. Finally, the other theme that is explored is individualism. One of the most important messages in this film is to be yourself. It's as simple as that. You don't have to conform to be happy. Just be yourself and you will be the happiest person in the world.

This short film is based on my personal experience. The inspiration of this film started out in 2009, when I was 12 years old. There were a lot of changes that happened in my life. First, my best friend moved away to Wyoming. Right after he met me in school when we were 10, we instantly got connected and became best friends. We hung out together almost all the time. We made awesome memories such as riding on go-karts and spending time in his house. He was a perfect friend for me. Unfortunately, he had to move away when we were 12. I was really heartbroken because I wanted him to be in school with me until we graduate. I became really sad after that point.

2008

However, this is not the only change that happened. After summer, my sister moved away to college. It was really hard for me because I didn't know what it's like for a sibling to move to college. Finally at school, I was having more classmates. The class was getting big to the point that I started seeing a group of girls talk to each other while a group of boys did the same. I tried talking to them but they seemed to ignore me. As a result, I started becoming lonely and depressed. There were a lot of changes in my life in a very short period of time. It was too much for me to handle.

Whenever I turned 14, I started becoming very sensitive of two things. First, I started hearing my classmates use profanity. I didn't want them to say bad words because I thought they are bad. Since I was little, I was taught by my parents to not say them. So, from what I've been taught, my classmates were doing the wrong thing. I started telling them to stop saying bad words, but they either ignored me or they argued with me by saying that they are not bad words. I wished there was a way for them to stop using profanity, which is the main motivation of the Marko, the main character of this story.

At the same time, I started to hear jokes that I didn't get or pay attention to, which caused me to have anxiety attacks. I would get so angry to the point that I burst out crying. Anxiety attack is something that I'm exploring in the first scene of the film. This scene is raw because I'm showing the audience exactly what I went through to have anxiety attacks. This is something that I don't want to go through ever again. 2009 to 2012 were the worst years of my life.

However, something really important happened in my life that was an eye-opener. One morning, I was talking to my mom about this problem, and what she did next is that she gave me one important advice. She said something like "Don't worry about what other people say. Just focus on your own problems." From that point on, somehow, my life was starting to get better. First, I started seeing my classmates in a different perspective. I didn't see them as heartless jerks anymore. I started seeing them as the people who just want to have fun. At that point, I started getting along with them and having fun with them. I realized that I was becoming optimistic.

Finally, I graduated high school as a valedictorian. I was so grateful about that because I had been dreaming of being a valedictorian since I was 12, but it finally came true. I made myself a graduation speech and I spoke in front of the audience during graduation. I told them this story and how much I'm going to miss my classmates. After I finished the speech, the audience clapped. While I was on my way to sit back on my chair, all of my classmates came up to me and gave me a group hug. That was the best moment that I ever have with them. That was the time that I felt so much love from them. The feeling was overwhelming that I screamed in joy. I will never forget this moment.

2015

After graduation, I went to South Plains College to major in Radio, Television, & Film. I was so excited to go to college because I wanted to meet new people. While I was there, I made a lot of new friends, including my new best friend. I met him during my second semester there. He was like the best friend that I had when I was 11. We talked a lot every day. We were talking in the cafeteria and we talked while we were walking around campus. Those were amazing times because I hadn't had a friend in years who I actually hung out with. I was having a true experience of friendship, something that I see people have every day. Unfortunately, we had to part ways when we left South Plains College. I was really sad because I thought the same thing is happening again. I won't see my best friend anymore. What was different this time is that I knew how to face these changes because I've been experiencing them. Because of that, I wasn't depressed for a long time. I knew what to do. I've been keeping in touch with him sometimes since then. I hope that I can see him again someday.

2017

Finally, I am currently at the University of North Texas where I am trying to make my first short film. This is really cool because I am a writer and director of this film. I love being a writer of the film because I can tell a story that is based on my personal experience. I now have the ability to tell the story in a script. This is amazing because I want to express myself and let the audience know what I went through in junior high and high school. I also love being a director because I can be a leader and assign my crew tasks to get this production done. I want to be a leader because I want to have the ability to reach my goals. If I don't, then it would be hard for me to pursue my dreams.

Well, these are all the themes and inspirations of the film. I want to make this film because I want to express my personality and tell a story based on my personal experience. And, I also want to inspire everybody with all the themes and messages that I'm trying to convey. Making a short film is a completely new experience for me. Since this is my first time doing this, I know for sure that there will be a lot of new things to learn along the way. I'm really excited for that because I love to learn. I want to know how filmmakers are involved in a production. I hope that I can be able to shoot the film and complete the production. It would be the most rewarding experience that I have in my life.