LUCY and LUCIEN

are two childhood friends

on the verge of career breakthroughs: 

LUCY just landed the coveted lead in an edgy, off-Broadway play;

LUCIEN is about to debut his first solo show at a prestigious art gallery.

Life is also looking up for their friend group: 

ELLE, a non-binary rock star, is leaving for a worldwide tour as the opening act;

AURELIA just got engaged to her girlfriend;

and their old friend WILL just moved back to the city looking for a new start.

But the night of Lucien’s show, things go awry:

Will is maliciously outed as a sex worker, and Lucien goes completely AWOL for the evening,

disappearing to feed a meth addiction that has spiraled out of control.

As Lucy frantically tries to find Lucien,

her cousin MATT makes a surprising, ominous appearance.

As Lucien tries to recover from his addiction, and as Lucy gets closer to opening night,

Matt lurks at the periphery, causing more and more

disturbing childhood secrets

to be uncovered.

If Lucy and Lucien are to survive and reclaim their art and their lives,

they must face Matt and their childhood traumas head-on.

They must rely on their found family of artists and sex workers

to pull them through.

I began writing this story in August of 2017.

On a hot, late summer afternoon, I left a beloved friend alone in a stranger’s apartment on the Upper East Side and walked home to Harlem, despairing.

My friend, a prince among men and one of the greatest artists I’ve ever known, had succumbed once again to meth addiction, and I finally faced the awful truth:

I was helpless in the face of his trauma,

and more than that, 

I was helpless in the face of my own.

We grew up worlds apart, but we were both haunted by past abuse and trauma. It followed us into every room, every relationship, every job, and every bed. His trauma led him into deep addiction, mine led me to isolation, self-harm, and dark nights drunk in dive bars, going home with strangers, and waking up alone.

I was trying to save him because, yes, I loved him and needed him alive; but also because I wanted to save myself and I didn’t know how.

I thought if I could help him, I could help myself,

but we were both drowning.

I wrote this story to see if I could write a way out for us. To see if, through this process, I could bring us both safely to shore.

Brian Otaño, a tremendous playwright & screenwriter, who is also sober from meth for 16 years, dove in to help guide me. 

We hired Tina Horn, a phenomenal semi-retired sex worker & journalist, in the early part of the writing process to act as a consultant for areas of the script that deal with sex work, kink, and porn making. We also consulted with porn stars Will Havoc, Mickey Mod, and several other sex workers (who are not out), who offered direct and concrete feedback on the characters, script, and story arc. 

I am immeasurably grateful to all of them for their labor & guidance in telling this story. 

This movie isn’t for us, it’s for you.

Once the film is made, we’re shooting for the moon — aiming for a full festival run, then hopefully onto a major streaming service where our story could be seen all over the world.

Isabel (Writer/Director & "Lucy") (she/her) is a New York-based writer, producer, and actor. She is a Managing Member and Co-Founder of Precariat Productions and an archive producer for Lion Television. Born and raised in the mountains of Colorado, Isabel began her career as an actor at the Royal Court Theater in London, followed by her West End debut in The Children's Hour. After that, Isabel earned her stripes in the Chicago theater scene by acting at Steppenwolf & the Goodman Theater. In New York, Isabel began filmmaking with her first short film, FOR MARTA, which was screened at numerous film festivals and was a Katra Film Series Finalist. She has since produced a short film by Will Eno & Oliver Butler starring Joyce Van Patten, a much raved about off-off-Broadway production of Tennessee Williams’ A Streetcar Named Desire which featured the first known Trans/ Non-binary actor in the iconic role of Blanche DuBois, and she has archive produced 8 different television shows for Travel Channel, Discovery Channel, and Investigation Discovery. She is a member of WGAE & a queer kid. Education: BA Hons. Acting, Guildhall School of Music & Drama, London, UK.

Brian Otaño (Co-Writer) (he/him) is an LA-based playwright and screenwriter who is currently a staff writer for the TV series CRUEL SUMMER on Freeform. Brian grew up in Brooklyn, NY, where he worked as a playwright and a scenic artist at the Metropolitan Opera for nine years before moving to LA. He is currently developing new plays with Geffen Playhouse Writers’ Room and CTG Writers Workshop. Most recently, he co-wrote You Across From Me, the 2018 Humana Festival PTC show. Full-length plays include The Dust, Tara, Zero Feet Away, and The Dooley Street Trilogy. His work has been performed, developed, and workshopped with New York Theater Workshop, Roundabout Theatre Company, Page 73, Ars Nova, Atlantic Theater Company, New Dramatists, INTAR, LAByrinth, LARK Play Development Center, The Amoralists, The Attic Theater Company, Judson Memorial Church and SPACE on Ryder Farm. Residencies/Fellowships: NHMC TV Writers Fellowship, Page 73’s Interstate 73 Writers Group, New York Theater Workshop 2050 Fellowship, New Dramatists Van Lier Fellowship, ArsNova’s Playgroup. Education: BFA, Dramatic Writing (SUNY Purchase). 

Sterling Milan (Executive Producer) (he/him) is the Head of Original Content at Westbrook Inc, which was founded by Jada Pinkett Smith and Will Smith in 2019. He is an experienced, professional, and award-winning television & film director and producer with a demonstrated history of producing content for a variety of global brands, including Travel Channel, Investigation Discovery, DIY, Nat Geo Wild, YouTube, Logo, VH1 and MTV. Sterling directed Michael K. Williams in the much raved about short film ABOUT THE PEOPLE, he also wrote and directed the hit indie short film BLACK MOVIE NIGHT. Most recently, Sterling directed the Netflix documentary SHE DID THAT, which is an extension of Renae Bluitt's “In Her Shoes” blog. The documentary offers an intimate peek inside the lives of four Black women who continuously raise the glass ceiling for future generations. He is represented by The Gersh Talent Agency. 

Ryan Guiterman (Executive Producer) (he/him) is a writer, director, and producer. He is a Managing Member and Co-Founder of Precariat Productions, and he is also a senior editor and producer at Goldcrest Films. He has directed several short films and a number of commercials, including one with Daniel Radcliffe. Ryan also co-produced IMPERIUM starring Daniel Radcliffe and URGE starring Pierce Brosnan. He has also worked with Julianne Moore and Alec Baldwin on STILL ALICE, and Olivia Wilde and Luke Wilson on MEADOWLAND. Most recently, Ryan finished directing his first feature film, CANVAS. He also just finished editing the forth-coming Universal Music Group & Def Jam documentary MIXTAPE. He is the proud son of an NYC firefighter. Education: BFA, SUNY Purchase.

Maria Palacio (Line Producer) (she/her) is a Brooklyn-based filmmaker & photographer who was inspired through her own experience as an up-and-coming filmmaker to create a forum to nurture other emerging artists in the field by establishing the Revolution Me Film Festival in 2016. With the experience in assisting the Big Mini Media Film Festival at Long Island University during her graduate tenure, she used the skills and knowledge to turn the Revolution Me Film Festival into an annual event, attracting filmmakers from all over the world. 

Maria has written and directed two short films, NECROMANCER (2015) and THE UNKNOWN (2017). Both have screened at numerous festivals & have received award nominations. She is also one of the producers of the award-winning prologue of THE PROMISE, a docu-series on childhood cancer. She has produced a web series, I F#%$ING QUIT, and has written/directed her own web series, PAY IT FORWARD, IN DEATH. Maria holds an MFA & BA in Media Arts with a focus in screenwriting and directing from Long Island University.

Vuk Lungulov-Klotz (Director of Photography) (he/him) is a transgender filmmaker, born in New York City from Chilean and Serbian immigrants with a culturally diverse upbringing- having been raised in Chile, the USA, and Serbia. After finishing high school in Chile he moved to the USA and graduated from the SUNY Purchase Film Conservatory in 2016. He was part of the 2018 Sundance Writers Lab with his feature film script MUTT, as well as the 2019 Sundance Talent Forum and the 2018 Inside Out Financing Forum. His trans-themed short films have screened at Inside Out Toronto Film Festival, NewFest New York Film Festival, as well as GAZE International LGBT Film Festival, and others. He mentored under Janet Mock in POSE Season 2 as part of the Ryan Murphy Half Initiative Program. He currently lives and works in Brooklyn as a film freelancer while working towards making his debut feature film, MUTT. 

Ariel Mahler (First AD) (she/they) is a nonbinary filmmaker, AD, and queer & trans rights advocate. Ariel’s most recent project, “Flock”, is an independent short thriller that stars two trans leads and features an almost entirely trans crew. Last year, Mahler released BAD ALLY (dir. Nyala Moon), an irreverent web series they co-created with Daquisha Jones. Ariel worked as an Assistant Director on SALACIA, written and directed by trans icon Tourmaline, as well as FLOURISH by Heather María Ács, and TELL BY DATE by Sarah Ball. In 2018, Ariel produced DEATH & BOWLING, a feature film created by more than 40 trans people. Ariel is constantly inspired by the many trans filmmakers and artists who are consistently making work and pushing boundaries, especially in such a volatile political culture. They feel that an intersectional transmedia revolution is on the horizon, and they couldn't be more pumped.

Sam Encarnación ("Lucien") (he/him) is a Dominican-American actor based in New York City. He is a Managing Member of Precariat Productions. Diagnosed with ADHD as a young child, Sam's parents decided to forgo medication and enrolled him in dance classes to focus his "excess energy". He began dancing in De Colores, a D.C based Mexican Folkloric dance company, eventually becoming its lead choreographer. In high school, through a fortuitous turn of events, he began drama studies at Paso Nuevo, a bilingual after-school theater program in the district. After graduating high school he received a full scholarship to study at The Stella Adler Conservatory NYC. Credits: Elegba in The Brothers Size for Syracuse Stage (NY, Johannesburg & Cape Town SA) Nini in Zayd Dhorn’s Long Way Go Down for The Harold Clurman Lab Theatre (East Coast Premiere). The Devil and Thomas Briggs at The Peoples Theatre Lab (World Premiere NYC),  Top Dog/UnderDog, Anton Dudley’s Letters to the End of the World (Original cast), A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Bodas De Sangre at the Gala Hispanic Theatre. Sam has also appeared on JESSICA JONES, PARIAH, and LAW & ORDER: SVU. 

Franco ("Will" & Co-Producer) (he/him) is a New York-based actor and writer. He is a Managing Member of Precariat Productions. Franco grew up in Southern California, the eldest of four children. A lover of risk and adventure, he decided to abandon a career in law enforcement and pursue an opportunity to train at the Guildhall School of Music & Drama, in London, England. After finishing his courses there, Franco moved to NYC where he’s done multiple films, T.V. shows, and stage productions. TV credits include THE BLACKLIST (NBC), THE FIRST (Hulu), SHE'S GOTTA HAVE IT, BILLIONS, BLUE BLOODS, THE GOOD WIFE, UNFORGETTABLE, and PERSON OF INTEREST. Film credits include BRAWL IN CELL BLOCK 99 (with Vince Vaughn), JANE WANTS A BOYFRIEND, and MI AMERICA. Recent theater credits include Tanya Saracho's FADE at the Dallas Theater Center. 

Russell Peck ("Elle" & Co-Producer) (they/she) is a New York City-based trans/non-binary actor and performance artist. Russell is a Managing Member of Precariat Productions. They grew up in Concord, Massachusetts, and graduated with a BFA in Drama from Tisch School of the Arts at New York University. Russell has performed at multiple venues in the city over the years including Theatre Row, Abingdon Theatre, New York Theatre Workshop, Joe's Pub, The Flea, Abrons Art Center, Under St. Marks, Looking Glass Theatre, and Smalls Jazz Club. Previous credits include Cabaret, Coriolanus, Crazy For Gershwin, Frankenstein, and Gross Indecency, as well a workshop of Liz Swados’ The Nomad at The Flea and Here and Their for 5th Avenue Theater in Seattle. Film credits include THE LONELY WHALE, THE BRITS ARE COMING, THE CON IS ON with Uma Thurman and the upcoming feature films THE VOLUNTEERS and CANVAS. Most recently, Russell made history as the first trans actor to play Blanche DuBois in Precariat’s critically acclaimed production of A Streetcar Named Desire, directed by Kevin Hourigan. They are currently working on a television series adaptation of C. Russell Price’s book of poetry "Tonight, We Fuck The Trailerpark Out Of Each Other" with co-writer Ryan Czerwonko. Proud AEA member.

Max Carpenter ("Matt") (he/him) is an LA-based actor. Theatre credits include: A Streetcar Named Desire (Precariat Productions), Red Speedo (Center Rep), Come Back Little Sheeba (Huntington Theatre, Boston), A Few Good Men (Alley Theatre, Houston). Film/TV Credits include: LAW & ORDER: SVU, ABC's WHAT WOULD YOU DO? Education: NYU (Tisch Drama Award). 

Kenzie Weeks (Co-Producer) (she/her) is a Maine-based baker, chef, and hotel manager who is making her professional debut as Co-Producer.

Brian Pollock (Co-Producer & Social Media Director) (they/them)  is a genderqueer/non-binary actor, teaching artist, stage director, and producer based in New York City. Brian is the Social Media Manager for Precariat Productions, as well as the Associate Artistic Director of Wolfpack Theatrics and a founding member of The Fled Collective, a newly established company of theater artists committed to making radically equitable, anti-racist theater that dismantles colonialist practices. Brian previously co-produced Precariat’s groundbreaking and critically acclaimed production of A Streetcar Named Desire, directed by Kevin Hourigan, and Wolfpack Theatrics’ The Witch of St. Elmora Street by Joey Merlo. Brian is thrilled to be making their film-producing debut with Loud & Longing. Brian received their BFA in Drama at New York University’s Tisch School of the Arts.

Alexandra Cockrell (Co-Producer) (she/her) is an actor, writer, and educator. She is a graduate of The Royal Conservatoire of Scotland. She has taught acting at various summer programs, most notably the prestigious Interlochen Arts Camp and StART Osceola, a Juilliard drama division founded arts camp. Alexandra is a proud company member of Doghouse Ensemble Theatre in NYC and a Co-Founder of Venture Theatre Ensemble, a company based in Bermuda whose aim is to bring classical theatre to the island. Alexandra is making her film-producing debut with Loud & Longing. 

Photos & Video for this campaign were taken by the phenomenal

Rosie Soko, Carly Carpenter & Isabel Ellison

Our director Isabel and our brilliant DP Vuk have already started story-boarding and building shot lists. Here are several films we're using as inspiration: 

WEEKEND

[directed by Andrew Haigh, 2011]

IN THE MOOD FOR LOVE

[directed by Wong Kar Wai, 2000]

WHITE GIRL

[directed by Elizabeth Wood, 2016]

TOM AT THE FARM

[directed by Xavier Dolan, 2013]

JESÚS

[directed by Fernando Guzzoni, 2016]

Thank you for considering supporting our work, it means the world to us! We are already in pre-production and we have a good portion of our financing already secured, but we need your help to get over the finish line.

Your support in this campaign goes directly to the production — hiring talent and crew, securing great locations, renting equipment, purchasing costumes, paying for PPE & COVID-19 safety measures, and all the other necessities of filmmaking: food, transportation, and insurance. 

Here's a brief breakdown of what the funds from this campaign will go towards: 

There are two ways you can help us make this film come to life:

1) CONTRIBUTE & RECEIVE REWARDS! 

We have a ton of wonderful rewards and opportunities to offer up our gratitude for your help in making this film a reality. Contributions of any size, large and small, are deeply appreciated. Take a look at the list to the side and explore all our incredible rewards — see what strikes your fancy! 

2) TELL EVERYONE!

Absolutely nothing beats word of mouth advertising. You can help us build a surge of support and a community for the film by following us on Facebook & Twitter (@LoudandLonging) and Instagram (@loudandlongingfilm), liking, saving, and sharing our posts, and helping spread the word near and far about this story!  

We are set to film on location in New York City this summer 2021. We are monitoring the pandemic closely and will ensure that our sets are up to the highest level possible of precaution & safety. We will have a COVID-19 safety captain on set to ensure that all our crew & talent are regularly tested and that we all follow CDC & industry guidelines and maintain best practices for safely interacting with one another. Additionally, we have re-written large group scenes and changed locations in the script to better maintain a COVID-safe set. Every precaution will be taken to ensure the safety and comfort of our cast & crew. 

Thank you for taking the time to read all this — no, seriously, it's a lot!!!

Thank you for learning more about our work. We hope you will consider supporting us and help us bring this deeply personal story to life. 

❤️❤️❤️