And So I Stayed
New York City, New York | Film Feature
Documentary
This is a moving portrait of Kim, Nikki, and Tanisha, domestic violence survivors whose strikingly similar stories are separated by over 30 years. None of them were believed, and each of them was criminalized for fighting back against their abusers.
And So I Stayed
New York City, New York | Film Feature
Documentary
1 Campaigns | New York, United States
Green Light
This campaign raised $20,075 for distribution. Follow the filmmaker to receive future updates on this project.
181 supporters | followers
Enter the amount you would like to pledge
This is a moving portrait of Kim, Nikki, and Tanisha, domestic violence survivors whose strikingly similar stories are separated by over 30 years. None of them were believed, and each of them was criminalized for fighting back against their abusers.
About The Project
- The Story
- Wishlist
- Updates
- The Team
- Community
Mission Statement
The Story
AND SO I STAYED is a forthcoming documentary by Natalie Pattillo and Daniel A. Nelson about survivors of abuse who are incarcerated for killing their abusers in self-defense. This intimate film tells the story of how the legal system gets domestic violence wrong. These women paid a steep price with long prison sentences, lost time with loved ones, and painful memories.
Activist and formerly incarcerated survivor Kim Dadou Brown is a driving force in the passage of New York’s Domestic Violence Survivors Justice Act.
Nicole "Nikki" Addimando, a mother of two young children, suffered the consequences when a judge didn’t follow the law’s guidelines.
Tanisha Davis, a single mother who was ripped away from her son in 2013, is hopeful the new law is her way out of a harsh prison sentence.
AND SO I STAYED holds these systems accountable by highlighting the unjust misogyny and racism embedded in these power structures while portraying the resilience, hopes, and dreams of survivors.
This is a story of unwavering love, tenacious activism, and hope. This personal documentary captures the survivors’ childhoods as well as their hopes and dreams as adults. The film exposes the horrific abuse these women endured at the hands of their abusers and the unimaginable loss they experienced when the legal system not only failed to protect them, but also punished them for defending their lives.
The mission for this film to make an impact is a personal one for our co-director, producer, and writer, Natalie Pattillo. In 2010, her sister, Jennifer, was killed by her then-boyfriend. Natalie often wonders what would’ve happened if her sister, like the survivors in the film, fought back? Would she be in prison if she killed him to protect herself? So often, people say that survivors "could've left" but ignore the fact that while they are in the process of leaving and safety planning, the danger drastically escalates.
With courts and police throughout the country failing to respond to domestic violence reports, and now even more so during the pandemic, victims are left to do everything in their power to protect themselves and their children.
WOMEN’S PRISON POPULATIONS ARE TEEMING WITH SURVIVORS
Men serve less time for killing a woman.
The average prison sentence for men who kill their female partners is 2 to 6 years (National Coalition Against Domestic Violence). The average sentence for women who kill their male partners is 15 years, despite the fact that, as stated by NCADV’s findings, most women kill their abusive partners in self-defense.
Within the two weeks that victims try to leave their violent relationships, they are 70 times more likely to get killed by their abusers, according to the Domestic Violence Intervention Program.
One third of homicide victims with temporary protective orders were murdered within the first month of filing the order, according to a 10-city study.
COVID-19 is magnifying the dangers of staying at home with an abuser or having to share custody of a child with a violent ex — circumstances that existed well before the pandemic because of how our society and legal system responds.
AND SO I STAYED is incredibly urgent.
AND SO I STAYED IS IN POST-PRODUCTION
After five years of working on the film, we're thrilled to see it all coming to life. Thanks to the support of incredibly generous funders, grants, and a passionate and hardworking team/community, we have a fine cut that we're incredibly proud of and are ALMOST AT THE FINISH LINE! Working to finish the film during the pandemic came with its unique challenges, but we all rallied together (via our Zoom edit suite and socially distanced/COVID-safe film days) because we believe so deeply in the urgency and power of these survivors' stories.
AND SO I STAYED is edited by the incredible Tyler H. Walk who most recently edited the groundbreaking documentary WELCOME TO CHECHNYA, which was shortlisted for two Oscars (Documentary Feature and Visual Effects). He also took home the Sundance 2020 Special Jury Award for Editing for the same film. Tyler's previous work includes Oscar-nominated documentary HOW TO SURVIVE A PLAGUE and Michael Moore’s WHERE TO INVADE NEXT among others. We are thrilled to have Tyler editing our film to bring the stories of Kim, Nikki, and Tanisha to the big screen.
We’re working with our brilliant composer Osei Essed (THROUGH THE NIGHT, TOWER) on an original score. Also this month, we are working on sound mixing/editing and color correcting with truly talented pros such as IMRSV Sound (CRIP CAMP, MINDING THE GAP).
We've been submitting the film to festivals globally and are aiming for a 2021 premiere. As a supporter, you'll be the first to know when the film is available to view!
We're turning to you for support so we can plan and launch our robust impact campaign (more on that below). We are fundraising, especially during these times, because many grant opportunities for independent filmmakers have been shuttered or postponed indefinitely due to COVID-19. On top of that, we had to unexpectedly expand our production budget to cover costs such as masks, hand sanitizer, gloves, and goggles, and other PPE to ensure we operated with the utmost care. If small in-person events can take place for community screenings, we need to budget yet again for COVID-related safety expenses.
Your support can build our resiliency as independent filmmakers during this time of unique uncertainty. Together, we can make sure AND SO I STAYED gets the life it deserves through events, screenings, and community organizing so we can FREE SURVIVORS who are unjustly incarcerated.
This film has the power to motivate communities to protect and decriminalize survivors of abuse.
Our ultimate goal for the film's impact campaign: to free incarcerated survivors, starting with Tanisha and Nikki, who are in the film. With your generous contribution, we can have enough funding and community support to:
*Educate judges, lawyers, district attorneys, and beyond to be part of the fight for justice for survivors
*Host community and educational screenings virtually and in-person
*Get the film inside women's prisons throughout the country
*At in-person screenings, offer child care for attendees so caregivers can watch in comfort and safety
*Have mental health professionals and social workers from domestic violence organizations available at virtual or in-person screenings for immediate resources, grounding, and trauma-informed panel discussions
*Invite survivors in the film and their loved ones to speak on panels about their hopes and dreams for change
*Motivate communities throughout the country to advocate for the protection and healing of domestic violence survivors
*Teach kids and young adults about the dynamics of abuse and healthy relationships
*Spread the word about why equal employment and housing is vital for formerly incarcerated survivors
*Teach business owners why it's crucial to hire folks who have been impacted by the criminal legal system
*Reach survivors who are incarcerated, living with their abuser, or are healing after leaving a violent relationship so they can access the resources they deserve
*Create a network that highlights meaningful domestic violence legislation around the country to craft actionable tasks for viewers who watch the film and ask, “What can I do,” in their own communities
Wishlist
Use the WishList to Pledge cash and Loan items - or - Make a pledge by selecting an Incentive directly.
Child Care & Virtual Activity for Kids and Teens
Costs $7,000
Free childcare & virtual activities about healthy relationships for kids & teens at community events
ASL Interpreter
Costs $1,200
ASL Interpreters can cost up to $300 per screening/event.
Honorarium and Travel for Film Fests
Costs $6,000
Fests don't usually pay for film subjects to speak on panels or for their travel. We want to!
Closed Captioning
Costs $2,500
For the film to be accessible to all, we plan on adding closed captioning.
Educational Guide
Costs $3,300
Graphic design and editorial costs to create custom curriculum guides for legal trainings.
Cash Pledge
Costs $0
Direct link:
Share this update!
About This Team
Co-Director/Producer/Director of Photography Daniel A. Nelson recently finished work as a cinematographer and researcher on Oscar-nominated director David France's feature-length documentary THE DEATH AND LIFE OF MARSHA P. JOHNSON, which celebrates the lasting political legacy of Marsha P. Johnson and seeks to finally solve the mystery of her unexplained death, that premiered at the 2017 Tribeca Film Festival and landed on Netflix. Daniel received his Master's from the Columbia Journalism School in documentary filmmaking in 2016. His thesis at Columbia was a short documentary called POSTURE about the controversial world of competitive yoga, which premiered at the 2017 Long Island International Film Expo and was published on Yoga Journal.
Co-Director/Producer/Writer Natalie Pattillo is a New York-based multimedia journalist. Her reporting bylines include the New York Times, MSNBC, VICE, Jezebel, New York Magazine, Al Jazeera America and Salon. She received a Master's degree from Columbia Journalism School in 2017. Before moving to New York in 2015, she freelanced for Marfa Public Radio and West Texas Public Radio. Because Natalie has experienced domestic violence in a past relationship, her mission to uplift survivors and their stories is a personal one. Natalie’s own experiences as a survivor, as well as the passing of her sister who was killed at the hands of an abusive boyfriend in 2010, helps her understand what position the survivors in the film might have been in when they were fighting for their lives.
Associate Producer/Cinematographer Julian Lim is an Emmy-nominated documentary producer, shooter, and editor. Julian is also a graduate of the Columbia Journalism School program, where he teaches video journalism as an adjunct professor. He earned his B.A. in journalism and Asian American studies from San Francisco State University. Prior to Columbia, he has worked for The Philadelphia Inquirer, Gannett, and Gatehouse Media as a newspaper page designer.
Cinematographer Sarah Bellingham is a documentarian and freelance video journalist. She is an adjunct professor at the Columbia Journalism School for documentary and video journalism. Sarah’s past documentary work includes HLN’s Inside with Chris Cuomo, HHMI’s Great Transitions: The Origin of Birds and HHMI’s The Origin of Species: The Making of a Theory. Her freelance work has appeared on The Washington Post, BBC, Eurasianet, The Daily Beast and Food Network. After working in independent documentary in Boston, Sarah attended Columbia Journalism School where received the Columbia Alumni Fund, Jonathan Maslow Endowed Scholarship Fund, UPS, Keene and Taishoff Scholarships. Following graduation, she was awarded a Pulitzer Student Fellowship. Sarah is also the co-director and cinematographer of PEOPLE 4 TRUMP, a documentary following Trump supporters in Pennsylvania over the course of four years.
Editor Tyler H. Walk is a Sundance 2020 Special Jury Award for Editing, Cinema Eye award winning, and Emmy-nominated editor whose most recent projects include David France’s WELCOME TO CHECHNYA, the Oscar-Nominated HOW TO SURVIVE A PLAGUE, and Michael Moore’s WHERE TO INVADE NEXT. A graduate from Penn State University and The Edit Center, Tyler is also an amateur pinballer and pretend rock star by night. In addition to cutting feature films, Tyler is directing his first feature about the Small-World Phenomenon. His Bacon number is 2.
Composer Osei Essed is a multi-platform artist, performing and writing for screen and stage. Recent film composition credits include the award-winning films ALWAYS IN SEASON (2019 Sundance Special Jury Award), PERIOD. END OF SENTENCE (2019 Academy Award winner), TOWER (2018 Emmy winner) and JIM: THE JAMES FOLEY STORY (2016 Emmy Winner). Essed performs with the Brooklyn-based bands The Woes and Big Hands Rhythm and Blues Band.
Jacob Bloomfield-Misrach is a composer and sound supervisor. He owns the post production company IMRSV Sound, and has expanded the company nationally, partnering with Berkeley Sound Artists. Jacob now oversees 100 projects per year for clients like Marvel, Google, Apple, and Facebook, and won a Telly Award in 2016. He recently composed the score for the Slamdance Official Selection MAJNUNI, and was the Sound Supervisor for the 2020 Sundance Award winning film, CRIP CAMP. Other recent work includes YOU CANNOT KILL DAVID ARQUETTE (Super LTD) and 12 HOUR SHIFT (Magnet Releasing).
Current Team
Incentives
- The Story
- Wishlist
- Updates
- The Team
- Community
Mission Statement
The Story
AND SO I STAYED is a forthcoming documentary by Natalie Pattillo and Daniel A. Nelson about survivors of abuse who are incarcerated for killing their abusers in self-defense. This intimate film tells the story of how the legal system gets domestic violence wrong. These women paid a steep price with long prison sentences, lost time with loved ones, and painful memories.
Activist and formerly incarcerated survivor Kim Dadou Brown is a driving force in the passage of New York’s Domestic Violence Survivors Justice Act.
Nicole "Nikki" Addimando, a mother of two young children, suffered the consequences when a judge didn’t follow the law’s guidelines.
Tanisha Davis, a single mother who was ripped away from her son in 2013, is hopeful the new law is her way out of a harsh prison sentence.
AND SO I STAYED holds these systems accountable by highlighting the unjust misogyny and racism embedded in these power structures while portraying the resilience, hopes, and dreams of survivors.
This is a story of unwavering love, tenacious activism, and hope. This personal documentary captures the survivors’ childhoods as well as their hopes and dreams as adults. The film exposes the horrific abuse these women endured at the hands of their abusers and the unimaginable loss they experienced when the legal system not only failed to protect them, but also punished them for defending their lives.
The mission for this film to make an impact is a personal one for our co-director, producer, and writer, Natalie Pattillo. In 2010, her sister, Jennifer, was killed by her then-boyfriend. Natalie often wonders what would’ve happened if her sister, like the survivors in the film, fought back? Would she be in prison if she killed him to protect herself? So often, people say that survivors "could've left" but ignore the fact that while they are in the process of leaving and safety planning, the danger drastically escalates.
With courts and police throughout the country failing to respond to domestic violence reports, and now even more so during the pandemic, victims are left to do everything in their power to protect themselves and their children.
WOMEN’S PRISON POPULATIONS ARE TEEMING WITH SURVIVORS
Men serve less time for killing a woman.
The average prison sentence for men who kill their female partners is 2 to 6 years (National Coalition Against Domestic Violence). The average sentence for women who kill their male partners is 15 years, despite the fact that, as stated by NCADV’s findings, most women kill their abusive partners in self-defense.
Within the two weeks that victims try to leave their violent relationships, they are 70 times more likely to get killed by their abusers, according to the Domestic Violence Intervention Program.
One third of homicide victims with temporary protective orders were murdered within the first month of filing the order, according to a 10-city study.
COVID-19 is magnifying the dangers of staying at home with an abuser or having to share custody of a child with a violent ex — circumstances that existed well before the pandemic because of how our society and legal system responds.
AND SO I STAYED is incredibly urgent.
AND SO I STAYED IS IN POST-PRODUCTION
After five years of working on the film, we're thrilled to see it all coming to life. Thanks to the support of incredibly generous funders, grants, and a passionate and hardworking team/community, we have a fine cut that we're incredibly proud of and are ALMOST AT THE FINISH LINE! Working to finish the film during the pandemic came with its unique challenges, but we all rallied together (via our Zoom edit suite and socially distanced/COVID-safe film days) because we believe so deeply in the urgency and power of these survivors' stories.
AND SO I STAYED is edited by the incredible Tyler H. Walk who most recently edited the groundbreaking documentary WELCOME TO CHECHNYA, which was shortlisted for two Oscars (Documentary Feature and Visual Effects). He also took home the Sundance 2020 Special Jury Award for Editing for the same film. Tyler's previous work includes Oscar-nominated documentary HOW TO SURVIVE A PLAGUE and Michael Moore’s WHERE TO INVADE NEXT among others. We are thrilled to have Tyler editing our film to bring the stories of Kim, Nikki, and Tanisha to the big screen.
We’re working with our brilliant composer Osei Essed (THROUGH THE NIGHT, TOWER) on an original score. Also this month, we are working on sound mixing/editing and color correcting with truly talented pros such as IMRSV Sound (CRIP CAMP, MINDING THE GAP).
We've been submitting the film to festivals globally and are aiming for a 2021 premiere. As a supporter, you'll be the first to know when the film is available to view!
We're turning to you for support so we can plan and launch our robust impact campaign (more on that below). We are fundraising, especially during these times, because many grant opportunities for independent filmmakers have been shuttered or postponed indefinitely due to COVID-19. On top of that, we had to unexpectedly expand our production budget to cover costs such as masks, hand sanitizer, gloves, and goggles, and other PPE to ensure we operated with the utmost care. If small in-person events can take place for community screenings, we need to budget yet again for COVID-related safety expenses.
Your support can build our resiliency as independent filmmakers during this time of unique uncertainty. Together, we can make sure AND SO I STAYED gets the life it deserves through events, screenings, and community organizing so we can FREE SURVIVORS who are unjustly incarcerated.
This film has the power to motivate communities to protect and decriminalize survivors of abuse.
Our ultimate goal for the film's impact campaign: to free incarcerated survivors, starting with Tanisha and Nikki, who are in the film. With your generous contribution, we can have enough funding and community support to:
*Educate judges, lawyers, district attorneys, and beyond to be part of the fight for justice for survivors
*Host community and educational screenings virtually and in-person
*Get the film inside women's prisons throughout the country
*At in-person screenings, offer child care for attendees so caregivers can watch in comfort and safety
*Have mental health professionals and social workers from domestic violence organizations available at virtual or in-person screenings for immediate resources, grounding, and trauma-informed panel discussions
*Invite survivors in the film and their loved ones to speak on panels about their hopes and dreams for change
*Motivate communities throughout the country to advocate for the protection and healing of domestic violence survivors
*Teach kids and young adults about the dynamics of abuse and healthy relationships
*Spread the word about why equal employment and housing is vital for formerly incarcerated survivors
*Teach business owners why it's crucial to hire folks who have been impacted by the criminal legal system
*Reach survivors who are incarcerated, living with their abuser, or are healing after leaving a violent relationship so they can access the resources they deserve
*Create a network that highlights meaningful domestic violence legislation around the country to craft actionable tasks for viewers who watch the film and ask, “What can I do,” in their own communities
Wishlist
Use the WishList to Pledge cash and Loan items - or - Make a pledge by selecting an Incentive directly.
Child Care & Virtual Activity for Kids and Teens
Costs $7,000
Free childcare & virtual activities about healthy relationships for kids & teens at community events
ASL Interpreter
Costs $1,200
ASL Interpreters can cost up to $300 per screening/event.
Honorarium and Travel for Film Fests
Costs $6,000
Fests don't usually pay for film subjects to speak on panels or for their travel. We want to!
Closed Captioning
Costs $2,500
For the film to be accessible to all, we plan on adding closed captioning.
Educational Guide
Costs $3,300
Graphic design and editorial costs to create custom curriculum guides for legal trainings.
Cash Pledge
Costs $0
Direct link:
Share this update!
About This Team
Co-Director/Producer/Director of Photography Daniel A. Nelson recently finished work as a cinematographer and researcher on Oscar-nominated director David France's feature-length documentary THE DEATH AND LIFE OF MARSHA P. JOHNSON, which celebrates the lasting political legacy of Marsha P. Johnson and seeks to finally solve the mystery of her unexplained death, that premiered at the 2017 Tribeca Film Festival and landed on Netflix. Daniel received his Master's from the Columbia Journalism School in documentary filmmaking in 2016. His thesis at Columbia was a short documentary called POSTURE about the controversial world of competitive yoga, which premiered at the 2017 Long Island International Film Expo and was published on Yoga Journal.
Co-Director/Producer/Writer Natalie Pattillo is a New York-based multimedia journalist. Her reporting bylines include the New York Times, MSNBC, VICE, Jezebel, New York Magazine, Al Jazeera America and Salon. She received a Master's degree from Columbia Journalism School in 2017. Before moving to New York in 2015, she freelanced for Marfa Public Radio and West Texas Public Radio. Because Natalie has experienced domestic violence in a past relationship, her mission to uplift survivors and their stories is a personal one. Natalie’s own experiences as a survivor, as well as the passing of her sister who was killed at the hands of an abusive boyfriend in 2010, helps her understand what position the survivors in the film might have been in when they were fighting for their lives.
Associate Producer/Cinematographer Julian Lim is an Emmy-nominated documentary producer, shooter, and editor. Julian is also a graduate of the Columbia Journalism School program, where he teaches video journalism as an adjunct professor. He earned his B.A. in journalism and Asian American studies from San Francisco State University. Prior to Columbia, he has worked for The Philadelphia Inquirer, Gannett, and Gatehouse Media as a newspaper page designer.
Cinematographer Sarah Bellingham is a documentarian and freelance video journalist. She is an adjunct professor at the Columbia Journalism School for documentary and video journalism. Sarah’s past documentary work includes HLN’s Inside with Chris Cuomo, HHMI’s Great Transitions: The Origin of Birds and HHMI’s The Origin of Species: The Making of a Theory. Her freelance work has appeared on The Washington Post, BBC, Eurasianet, The Daily Beast and Food Network. After working in independent documentary in Boston, Sarah attended Columbia Journalism School where received the Columbia Alumni Fund, Jonathan Maslow Endowed Scholarship Fund, UPS, Keene and Taishoff Scholarships. Following graduation, she was awarded a Pulitzer Student Fellowship. Sarah is also the co-director and cinematographer of PEOPLE 4 TRUMP, a documentary following Trump supporters in Pennsylvania over the course of four years.
Editor Tyler H. Walk is a Sundance 2020 Special Jury Award for Editing, Cinema Eye award winning, and Emmy-nominated editor whose most recent projects include David France’s WELCOME TO CHECHNYA, the Oscar-Nominated HOW TO SURVIVE A PLAGUE, and Michael Moore’s WHERE TO INVADE NEXT. A graduate from Penn State University and The Edit Center, Tyler is also an amateur pinballer and pretend rock star by night. In addition to cutting feature films, Tyler is directing his first feature about the Small-World Phenomenon. His Bacon number is 2.
Composer Osei Essed is a multi-platform artist, performing and writing for screen and stage. Recent film composition credits include the award-winning films ALWAYS IN SEASON (2019 Sundance Special Jury Award), PERIOD. END OF SENTENCE (2019 Academy Award winner), TOWER (2018 Emmy winner) and JIM: THE JAMES FOLEY STORY (2016 Emmy Winner). Essed performs with the Brooklyn-based bands The Woes and Big Hands Rhythm and Blues Band.
Jacob Bloomfield-Misrach is a composer and sound supervisor. He owns the post production company IMRSV Sound, and has expanded the company nationally, partnering with Berkeley Sound Artists. Jacob now oversees 100 projects per year for clients like Marvel, Google, Apple, and Facebook, and won a Telly Award in 2016. He recently composed the score for the Slamdance Official Selection MAJNUNI, and was the Sound Supervisor for the 2020 Sundance Award winning film, CRIP CAMP. Other recent work includes YOU CANNOT KILL DAVID ARQUETTE (Super LTD) and 12 HOUR SHIFT (Magnet Releasing).